Hi..
After what seems like ages, I find the equipment to mail!!! Well I just read this 'diary entry' of mine, written on 1 rainy day!! The day it was raining 'buffaloes' :)
You know after meeting you all today, the feeling was strange i.e once I bid you all goodbye! Remember while you were leaving today,Shashank, I said to you that this feeling of 'parting' has not yet sunk in??But now when I read one old mail and as I am writing this mail, somehow I am feeling a little nostalgic. I dont know whether or not nostalgic is the right word but I am feeling not that happy.
Till now I am not sure whether or not I'll b moving over to Mumbai, as in even though my suitcase is all packed, literally, even then I cant be 100% sure 'bout going till the time I step into Mumbai Rajdhani! But even then, its like I am feeling that somehow the ease with which we have been used to calling each other over, thats a different thing that our 'meetings' take ages to mature, wont be there now. Not that we wont be willing to meet, but even though we'll be more willing than ever, we wont be able to!
Looking back, even though it might sound cliched, 2003 seems like just this very year! Time genuinely flies by!! I cant say about others, but it did in our case atleast!
Its weird...I can write really long mails but at this point of time, I really seem to have lost my ability to write. All I can do right this very moment is think-think about all the times that we've spent together, that technically means 24/7!! Seriously, am thinking about our lunch breaks...our laughs....our 'dont talk to me days'...our 'speak up' days...our mail days...our,well, your 'making fun of me' days....everything!!
Even though some 2 months back I was all for leaving this college, this place...well the 'freedom singh' in me was calling to me ;) but today I want us to be together just some time more...I want to be a part of this famous 9 bandwagon for a just a little bit longer...
This is coming straight from the heart-I dont want to leave you all and go!! I genuinely dont! Lets start up our own company, lets do anything but stay together!!
Is it too soon to feel this way???But I am already missing everyone as though today was our last day together, even though 2 ppl were missing...Really missed both of you...honestly..
Slowly all will be gone, and we'll all be left to ourselves, thats something I absolutely dont want but cant help!
Guys dont forget me...just remember, no matter how bad I have been, I've always loved 'us'.
Oh and yes, I would like to appolozise for everything, big and small, intentional (though I assure you there have been none) and unintentional things that I have done that might have hurt any of you, even in the slightest. I am extremely and genuienly sorry for all that.
I truely hope to remain in your lives for sure, and if I just have to be in your thoughts, would like to be a part of your 'happy memories'.
Miss you all..
Always remember a part of my prayers, everyday, will be reserved for each one of you respectively!! You'll always be with me!
Love
Thursday, June 21, 2007
With love..
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All of us, (and some more than rest) are so in-out of my thoughts frequently(even when one does not get many chances to talk-imagine, we actually find it hard to find time to talk and its jut one year!!!- and this happens more with you) that its not tough to fake conversations at times. i always think, this is what 'we' would have done, we would have gone there, said this and thought of that. and in this silly numbness i perhaps dont really realise sometimes that it's a lot of distance that has seeped in at times, and not just by kms.
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